The C word

When you think about it carefully, almost every one of us knows someone who had or has been affected by cancer. It’s not the most delightful of words but it is something that is heard daily by many people. Whenever there’s something wrong and the health professionals are unsure, we always think the worst. I know I have. When it actually comes down to it, we brush it off, try not to think too much about it. Do we every really expect cancer to come into our lives one way or another?

My mums health had taken a battering throughout all of 2016, we hoped 2017 would be a better year for us and our family. As of November last year my mums appendix ruptured and she almost lost her life, after multiple tests and check ups, 2017 looked a lot brighter. Whilst mum was being checked out, the nurses came across something strange on her liver and kidneys. We tried not to think much of it, we put it down to the poison from the appendix.

January 2017 marked the month that we heard the word cancer. The word makes you feel numb, I’ve been in shock ever since that day. I don’t find it hard to talk about it but at times I feel uncomfortable explaining to people that my mum has cancer. I think at times I’ve even laughed it off, as though it’s no biggie. Cancer takes you unexpectedly, it’s one of those things you can’t get your head around. Even when me and my mum have been organising things just in case all ends, still then I thought nothing of it. I carried on living my life as though nothing had changed. Being a 21 year old, the responsibility of taking over what my mum had left terrified me yet I still found it hard to register that it may be a possibility. 

Today, March 13th 2017 marks the day of mums operation. Still at times I feel numb. Every day I pray that she’ll end today cancer free, although I’m not the most religious I find it gives me peace of mind. The waiting around feeds the nerves, anxiously waiting for any kind of news. Although most of the time, the thought of the phone ringing sends a feeling of sickness through my entire body. How does anyone come to terms with that fact they or a loved one has cancer? This thing that’s inside them that they had no idea about. Knowing it’s there, not visible to the naked eye exactly but it’s still there. Feeling fine in yourself, yet feeling its presence. I know that I find that hard to come to terms with, let alone my mum.

So many people have to face this stress every day, go on living as best they can knowing that their lives may be changed forever. Cancer is a small word but one that has a great impact on most people’s lives. I will blogging regularly about my mums experience and hopefully her fast recovery. I am also aiming to raise some money in the next few months for MacMillan. We will beat cancer!


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